Have YOURSELF a Merry little Christmas

Let me first say this: I don't hate Christmas. I am not Scrooge. (I do, however, hate winter.)

Christmas is a wonderful, magical time for many. I'll give you that.
But remember, that for as many of you that enjoy it, there are many that don't, and for good reason.

Think about it...Holidays: family& friends, loved ones, giving, generosity, love. It's all beautiful. IF you have it. Some don't.

For many people the Holidays are a difficult period to have to deal with. Lots of you out there can't wait for the holidays to come around so you can celebrate with those you love. But there are those of us who see the Holidays as something that they can't wait to be over. And that's ok!
Don't try to make us 'cheer up' or 'get over it', or 'lighten up'. Because, you know...if we could, we WOULD! Christmas is a happy time for people who have: Loved ones who care enough about us to make us happy, Loved ones we care enough about to make THEM happy, young children full of joy and awe for the season, and FAMILY they can be close to..
Not everyone has all of that. Hell, some people have NONE of that!

Holidays are especially hard for those of us who have lost loved ones who were very close to us. It doesn't just go away, you don't just get over it. Telling someone to think of the happy times, and honor their memory, because they wouldn't want you to be unhappy, doesn't work. That's all well and good in theory, but let me tell you from personal experience that it doesn't fill the VOID that is left behind. Nothing will. We will get over it our own way, and in our own time.
Don't oversimplify solutions for us, it borders on condescension. Don't you think that if it was really that simple, we would just DO it? Trust me, no one WANTS to feel this bad. But handing out advice isn't going to help, it only makes us feel more dysfunctional and broken.

For some, the holidays are a time of GRIEVING what used to be, because we are bombarded by the 'ideals' (pressure) of family, joy, & happiness this time of year unlike any other. And, until we've had enough time to get past it, however much time that might be, just tell us you love us, and let us ask you for help if we WANT it. Ok? We love our friends for wanting to help us, but please let us do our own grieving in our own time and don't make us feel guilty for not living up to your expectations or standards, thank you.